The Birdie predicts records for Westmoreland County football teams

By: The Birdie
Saturday, August 17, 2019 | 11:51 PM

Westmoreland County’s high school football expert spent a sizzling summer day at Kennywood Park when the TribLive High School Sports Network recognized its Top 25 preseason team.

The big, wooden arrow was not pointing at him for once, so he blended in.

Nobody knew who he was as he scaled the park inconspicuously — the stealth of a ninja and the appetite of a ravenous lineman.

“I was not that guy who lost his lunch on the new Steelers coaster,” Birdie said. “That was someone else.”

Birdie has been working out (eating Potato Patch fries) as he prepares for a new season on the gridiron. He is smitten with the talented crop of linemen who have cast a shadow over the county this summer.

He has been called a hog before, but for different reasons.

“I want to be like those big boys up front,” Birdie said. “I want to show I can lift big tires and win tug-of-wars at those linemen challenges. And win wing-eating contests.

“I still have college eligibility left. Maybe I can get a FCS offer too.”

“Food Champion Supreme?” a copy editor interjects.

While old Mr. Birdie says it’s all right to dream, his coworkers think he should stick with his day job: picking winners on Friday nights and giving readers scoops.

“Speaking of scoops … I tried the pickle-flavored ice cream at Picklefest,” Birdie said. “Tasty stuff. Got a pint for $5, quite a dill.”

Birdie’s summer would have included the Regatta and WPXI Skylights, but both events were canceled.

“Sigh,” he said.

Instead, he used vacation time to take tours of local stadiums that underwent turf renovations. He tracked rubber pellets into the office (the black specs still don’t outnumber the pizza and doughnut crumbs on the floor around his desk).

He attempted to replace his own lawn with turf, but Mrs. Birdie stopped him before he could dig up her flower garden.

“She called me for grass interference,” Birdie quipped. “I re-carpeted my home office with leftover turf from Penn-Trafford. She said that was OK. Love that yellow tinge.”

The Birdie wasn’t done with the yard: He borrowed a few goats from Norwin during heat week to save on grass-cutting time.

“Goats working for the G.O.A.T.,” he said. “Sounds about right. Get off my lawn.”

Now for the reason you’re actually here: preseason predictions.

Belle Vernon

The Leps check all the appropriate boxes. Birdie says this is the year they’re actually better than Thomas Jefferson.

Wins: 9

Playoffs: Yes

Derry

After reaching the WPIAL title game at Heinz Field, the Trojans must replace some key players — like they do seamlessly every year.

Wins: 6

Playoffs: Yes

Franklin Regional

New faces will look to keep the perennially strong Panthers and their veteran coach in the hunt. But will there be chemistry?

Wins: 5

Playoffs: No

Greensburg Central Catholic

With a new coach and system in place, the Centurions will look to match personnel to the playbook. The potential is there.

Wins: 6

Playoffs: Yes

Greensburg Salem

The Golden Lions will continue their pursuit for win No. 700. It will take six wins, but they’ll come up just short.

Wins: 5

Playoffs: No

Hempfield

Class 6A continues to be a grind for the Spartans, and that grind will continue despite a nice array of playmakers and a decent line.

Wins: 4

Playoffs: No

Jeannette

McKee Stadium will have turf for the first time, and the Jayhawks will flash their speed on the new digs.

Wins: 10

Playoffs: Yes

Latrobe

Experience will do the Wildcats good, especially at some skill positions, but that line needs to catch up and that’ll take time.

Wins: 3

Playoffs: No

Ligonier Valley

The high-powered Rams usually are known for their skill players, but this year watch that massive front line open holes and produce wins.

Wins: 11

Playoffs: Yes

Monessen

Losing a dynamic quarterback surely will impact the Greyhounds, but new athletes will emerge as the season grows.

Wins: 6

Playoffs: Yes

Mt. Pleasant

The Birdie had gotten so used to seeing the Vikings in the playoffs he almost forgot they have missed the postseason two years in a row. Make it three.

Wins: 3

Playoffs: No

Norwin

An offensive line will show improvement and allow Jumpin’ Jack Flash to complete more passes. But how’s that defense going to be? It’s still 6A.

Wins: 4

Playoffs: No

Penn-Trafford

The area’s most structured program is more than details: It wins. Look for the Warriors to push for a title in 5A.

Wins: 10

Playoffs: Yes

Southmoreland

The pass-happy Scotties will score plenty of points, but stopping somebody, therein lies the secret sauce.

Wins: 5

Playoffs: No

Yough

The new-look Cougars will have a mountain to climb in a tough conference.

Wins: 3

Playoffs: No

Tags: Belle Vernon, Derry Area, Franklin Regional, Greensburg C.C., Greensburg Salem, Hempfield, Jeannette, Latrobe, Ligonier Valley, Monessen, Mt. Pleasant, Norwin, Penn-Trafford, Southmoreland, Yough