The Birdie knows how to handle a bad Steelers season and how to make Week 7 A-K Valley picks

By: The Birdie
Wednesday, October 12, 2022 | 5:12 PM

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Last week: 9-3

Overall: 70-11 (86.4%)

Some of you aren’t old enough to remember the Pittsburgh Steelers being a truly bad team, and it shows.

Let The Birdie tell you a story.

He was but a baby bird when he received two tickets to the Steelers’ 1986 home opener. When September rolled around, he was excited to put on his No. 57 Mike Merriweather jersey and fly to his seats in the 400 level at Three Rivers.

He watched the Steelers get stomped by the Denver Broncos, 21-10. John Elway threw three touchdown passes. Mark Malone threw two interceptions. The Steelers’ leading rusher was Frank Pollard with 9 yards. Nine.

The Steelers went on to finish 6-10, stringing together a second consecutive losing season.

And while the ’80s were generally a nightmare for The Birdie and other Steelers fans, that doesn’t come close to the futility older fans suffered through during the 50s and 60s.

So let us old birds give you some tips for dealing with a bad Steelers season.

• You don’t have to watch every game. At the risk of blowing up his spot, The Birdie played 18 holes in a little more than three hours each of the last two Sunday afternoons. Nobody on the course.

• Put a little money on the game. It’s legal now. The Birdie isn’t saying he made a few bucks parlaying Josh Allen over 2.5 passing touchdowns and Kenny Pickett over 0.5 interceptions Sunday, but he isn’t saying he didn’t.

• When constructing an effigy of a Steelers player, make sure to connect the jersey and the pants securely. The Birdie will never forget watching his yellow Malone effigy pants fluttering down to the turf from the 400 level just before kickoff of the 1987 home opener.

The Birdie’s coming off a bad week by his lofty standards: 9-3. He’ll try to fly higher this week.

• East Allegheny (5-2) at Deer Lakes (4-3): The Lancers have put together an odd three-game winning streak — low-scoring 9-0 and 7-2 wins sandwiched around a 37-36 barnburner. Who knows what to expect this week? East Allegheny, 34-33

• Apollo-Ridge (3-4) at Yough (2-5): Vikings will bounce back after a wild, back-and-forth loss to Imani last week. Apollo-Ridge, 28-7

• Frazier (0-7) at Springdale (0-7): Rebuilding teams collide. Springdale, 14-12

• Highlands (7-0) at Kiski Area (0-7): There is upset potential here. The Cavaliers are better than their record, and the Golden Rams might be looking ahead to Armstrong. Not picking that way. Just something to consider. Highlands, 30-13

• Knoch (0-7) at Freeport (6-1): Yellowjackets made another statement vs. EA last week. Freeport, 35-6

• Plum (3-4) at Penn-Trafford (4-3): This conference has been a wild one this year. Penn-Trafford, 27-13

• Riverview (3-4) at Leechburg (5-2): The Raiders are within a game of .500, but they’re running into trouble here. Leechburg, 40-14

• Steel Valley (4-0) at Burrell (5-2): Steel Valley and Serra Catholic are one heck of a one-two punch atop the Bucs’ section. Steel Valley, 27-6

• Woodland Hills (3-4) at Fox Chapel (0-7): The Foxes’ tough season doesn’t get any easier. The Wolverines are dangerous despite their record. Woodland Hills, 34-14

• Valley (1-6) at Shady Side Academy (2-4): The Bulldogs are a sleeper team down the stretch. They don’t have any bad losses. Shady Side Academy, 20-14

Tags: Apollo-Ridge, Burrell, Deer Lakes, East Allegheny, Fox Chapel, Frazier, Freeport, Highlands, Kiski Area, Knoch, Leechburg, Penn-Trafford, Plum, Riverview, Shady Side Academy, Springdale, Steel Valley, Valley, Woodland Hills, Yough