Before picking A-K Valley winners, The Birdie investigates Bishop Sycamore

Wednesday, September 1, 2021 | 5:29 PM

Last week: 9-3 (75%)

Everyone knows The Birdie as a professional prognosticator, but he’s picked up some investigative reporting skills over the years, too.

This week, he’s been sticking his beak into the Bishop Sycamore story. You know Bishop Sycamore, the alleged Ohio charter school with questionable credentials that played Sto-Rox and IMG Academy in a two-day span last weekend.

Birdie found out a few things.

First, he uncovered who the school’s namesake was. Bishop Sycamore was a 17th century monk who worked to free the tooth fairy from religious oppression. He became the patron saint of Manti Te’o’s girlfriend.

Second, Birdie discovered Bishop Sycamore’s schedule for the rest of the season. Take a look:

Sept. 3: Dillon Panthers

Sept. 10: Springfield Atoms

Sept. 17: Polk High Panthers

Sept. 24: South Central Louisiana State Mud Dogs

Oct. 1: Tom Landry Middle School Longhorns

Oct. 8: Ampipe Bulldogs

Oct. 15: Minnesota State Screaming Eagles

“Some tough matchups there,” Birdie said. “Keep an eye on that tailback for Polk High. No. 33. Nose for the end zone. And make sure to double-team No. 9 for the Mud Dogs. Big hitter. Well hydrated.”

In the fine tradition of Bishop Sycamore, Birdie is going to pretend like Week Zero didn’t really exist — 9-3 is not good enough — and rededicate himself to picking winners in Week 1.

Apollo-Ridge (0-1) at Avonworth (1-0): Did we forget about Avonworth because the Antelopes missed the playoffs last year? That’s a mistake. Avonworth, 26-12

Deer Lakes (0-1) at Armstrong (1-0): After opening with Springdale, the Lancers have to face another dynamic offense in Week 1. Armstrong, 40-22

Franklin Regional (1-0) at Kiski Area (1-0): A matchup of teams coming off solid openers. Should be a good one. Franklin Regional, 21-20

Freeport (0-1) at Knoch (0-1): Culture shock for the Yellowjackets. Facing a Wing-T after taking on Cadin Olsen in Week Zero. They’ll adapt. Freeport, 27-13

Hampton (1-0) at Fox Chapel (0-1): Foxes have a tough nonconference schedule. Good for development. Hard to rack up the wins. Hampton, 27-20

Highlands (1-0) at Valley (0-1): The Golden Rams did nothing in their opener to indicate this won’t be a big year for them. Highlands, 26-6

Indiana (0-1) at Burrell (0-1): Bucs look to be a work in progress. Indians won’t make it easy on them. Indiana, 21-13

Plum (0-1) at North Hills (1-0): Looks like the Mustangs will have some growing pains. North Hills was one of Week Zero’s most impressive teams. North Hills, 24-13

Shady Side Academy (1-0) at Springdale (1-0): A fun matchup between teams with big-play potential. Springdale, 30-26

Leechburg (1-0) at Summit Academy (0-1): To make the playoffs, you’ve got to win the games you’re supposed to win. Blue Devils will. Leechburg, 40-6

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